I would give just about anything for a long, deep claw-foot tub right about now, and on-demand hot water. And super-duper-bubbly bubble bath.

I have the entire bottle of champagne, unopened, to drink myself into oblivion with when I happen to chance across said claw-foot tub. I have novels waiting, unread, making long faces and puppy-dog eyes at me from their dusty perches on the bookshelf, to read (see: escape) when I find that tub.

Hell, I even have all manner of super-soothing, beautiful music to blare at ridiculous levels while I pretend I don't have neighbors or that said neighbors are deaf already so who cares how loud the music is anyway? when I discover that wonderful tub ...


The work situation is scary right now. Like, really really scary. People are being laid off left and right (although I've been assured several times that my job is totally secure) and one of my co-workers in the production department just got the axe today. That leaves me and my boss as the only two people in our department now, and while we are both damn fucking good at what we do, we're not that good. Even with energy drinks ... Even with energy drink IVs.

Sigh again.

To make up for the now re-goddamn-diculous understaffing issue in our department as well as the graphics department, the two departments are being merged. This will help, definately, but with the graphics department hurting just as much as we are, we still won't be able to keep up the pace we have been. Tasks will need to be reassigned, and that is always like pulling teeth around here. Or more like squeezing blood from a rock. Because we've been so damned fantastic and amazing and machine-like for so many years in the past, we are apparently thought to actually be machines, or minor gods, or just plain perfect in every way except for an annoying habit of demanding that other people do their jobs on time so we can do ours (imagine! The nerve!).

We're not perfect. We are only human, and we have human limits. Even with energy drinks (even through IVs!) we cannot cram 18 hours worth of work into 8 hours, even skipping lunches and breaks, much less do it every day and not get a wee tiny bit snippy about it. It's just not possible.

But we're expected to do it. And to smile about it, no matter how obviously fake and hate-laced the smiles are.

I'm perfecting my "happy-sneer." I've learned how to bare my incisors and make people think I'm still a darling little angel.

Oh, where oh where is that beautiful, claw-footed, double-bubbly oblivion? The thought that the master's degree I will earn someday after getting my bachelor's (which may now take me even longer to get, as I may have to change my schedule to maintain only one class per term all the way through, instead of taking two each for the last three terms) will allow me to have that claw-foot tub is the only thing some days that keeps me happy-sneering like a sweet thing, when what I really want to do is




Meme from Mum.

What is your favorite thing to wear? I have this pair of really great pajama pants that are bright blue with cartoon ducks all over them. The kicker? They're angel ducks and devil ducks. With those, an overly big T-shirt and no socks or shoes is just heaven.

Last meal you had at a restaurant: Old-fashioned spaghetti with meat sauce at The Spaghetti Factory in Citrus Heights, hearty portioned and split with Matt, with a scoop of Spumoni ice cream for dessert.

Name one thing that scares you: Spiders (see said "I hate Spiders" post a few down from this one).

Who was the last person in your bed? Matt, this morning, because he always gets to sleep in ...

What were you doing at 7:00 a.m.? Sleeping.

Last person you hugged? Matt.

Does anyone you know want to date you? Besides Matt? Not that I'm aware of.

When was your last encounter with the police? My Mom's answer: "About four years ago a young neighbor from up the street failed to make the turn at the end of our cul-de-sac and zooped headlong in his Toyota pickup down our short, very steep driveway. Apparently he forgot where his brake pedal was. He reached the bottom of the driveway at roughly 30 mph, where he crashed through the chain link fence dividing our property from our next-door neighbor’s. After taking out her second fence and heading into the forest, his Toyota finally stopped when it got stuck between two pine trees. The poor guy was, as you might have guessed, very drunk. Miraculously, he wasn't hurt, but he was dazed and disoriented. I helped him into our kitchen, gave him a cup of coffee and called the sheriff while he sat there alternately apologizing and complimenting the decor. The officer who showed up arrested him for driving under the influence. I felt bad – the guy was young and obviously messed up – but what do you do? There'd been damage done to our neighbor's property, and it was just sheer luck that I’d happened to park my own car up on the street the night before. Normally, it would have been right at the bottom of the drive, and he’d have crashed right into the back of it. At the time of morning this happened, my daughter and I could well have been getting into the car to go to work. We just happened to be running a little late, so we weren't walking up the driveway when he flew down it. So ... yeah. It was an interesting encounter. It was made even more memorable when the officer, who was sorta cute, flirted with me."

Yeah. That was creepy. While Mom got the glory of being flirted at by the cute cop, I got the anti-glory of being flirted at by the drunk, fence-crashing neighbor himself. I was not impressed.

Have you ever driven without a license? Nope.

What time of the day is it?12:36 p.m.

Who/What made you angry today? Not so much angry, as just disgusted at the ever increasing stupidity of drivers in general: Being cut off by some dick on Broadway this morning. He was stopped a a stop sign, and I was going straight on Broadway. He was not supposed to go ahead and pull onto BRoadway until it was safe to do so ... i.e., not when someone is only ten feet away from him and closing, on Broadway, without a stop sign (yeah, that'd be me). Dumbass pulled out right in front of me, slowly, and didn't even seem to notice that had I not slammed on the brakes and come to a complete stop (again, no stop sign for me) I'd have t-boned him.

Oh, sigh.

Do you want anyone? I want The Vampire Lestat. Badly.

Do you like birds? Yep. I still fondly remember waking up to the soft, sort of alien sounding coos of morning doves in the trees outside my window at the apartment where we lived in Bremerhaven, Germany, as a kid. I'd love to have a pair at home.

Do you download music? Occasionally, through iTunes. You should hop on iTunes and find my fiancee's new album: The Injured AERM Army, by Noisepsalm.

Do you care if your socks are dirty? Only when I don’t have any clean ones handy. In which case I’ll put the dirty ones on, wrinkling my nose, but I soon forget all about it. <-- Ditto, Mom.

Opinion of Chinese symbol tattoos? Unless you're Chinese or have some other meaningful connection to the Chinese culture, why not have words in your own language tattooed? At least then you'd be sure to get "Sweet Hunny Bunny Princess Grrrrl" inked on your butt, instead of "Prostitute."

What are you doing tonight? Working on and hopefully finishing my group project for school.

Do you like to cuddle? Yup.

Do you love anyone? Yup!

Whose bed did you sleep in last night? Mine.

Have you ever bungee jumped? Nope, and I don't care to, though I would like to try skydiving and base jumping.

Have you ever gone whitewater rafting? Nope, and I really don't care to, as I've never really relished the idea of bashing my brains in on a huge boulder after being dumped unceremoniously off of a silly little floating device that some crazy ass thought would be fun to ride down raging torrents of very fast, very strong water, just for the adrenaline rush and the hope of getting laid by a probably unimpressed girlfriend. I'll stick to swimming in calm waters, thanks.

Has anyone ten years older than you ever hit on you? Yes. Kinda creepy.

How many pets do you have? One Chinese Water Dragon named Heironymous, two kittens (Goblin and Sister), and a bunch of fish: one German Blue Ram - nameless, one (grape? grapevine?) Knife Fish named Tiger, one Parrot Fish named Peaches, one Gold Gaurami- nameless, one Betta named Asher, 27 tetras (13 blacklight, 13 neon, and one white cloud) - all nameless, at home. At work, I have a much smaller tank with four goldfish and one tiger barb.

Have you met a real redneck? I am a redneck myself.

What's the weather like there?$@#$%?!$%#!! hot. In #$%@$%?!$% October. $%?!$$%?!$?!!! damnit.

What are you listening to right now? Office whitenoise, fish tank filter, and coworker talking.

What was the last movie you watched? The Happening last night. M. Night needs to work on his casting. The story itself was fantastic, but much of the acting sucked very, very badly, which unfortunately killed it for me. C'mon, M. Night, you can find much better actors than Mark Walberg, and, well, most of the cast actually - only the guy who played Raul or Julien of whatever his name was did a good job. Even Zooey flopped in this one. Go back and watch Sixth Sense and see what you did exactly right with that one, then try to mimic that great casting in your next movie, cos seriously, you've got the gift for story telling, but you need to choose better people to portray them. Seriously.

Do you wear contacts? Nope. At least, not yet.

Where was the last place you went besides your house? The bank. It was more than a little depressing.

What are you wearing? Jeans, a pretty, flowery/artsy-type blouse, and my black slip-ons wit the little white, silver, and pink hearts all over them.

What’s one thing you’ve learned this year?


What do you usually order from Starbucks? Chai Latte with soy milk.

Ever had someone sing to you? Heh. Yes. Matt sings lots of questionably-humorous songs completely at random (often while showering), usually about turkeys, Jesus, Santa, and/or various parts of the human anatomy. They're not usually sung for or to me, but on occasion he'll come up with one for me and have me rolling.

Have you ever fired a gun? Yes, once, at targets at my friend's house long ago. Her family lives literally on the side of a mountain, and enjoys collecting and training in all manner of weaponry. While I'm not so great with guns or throwing axes, you might be nervous if I have a throwing knife on me and I'm mad at you, and if I'm mad at you and I've got a compound bow, well .. you're seriously fucked then. I have moidah-lized many, may soda cans and numerous buckets full of water on the first shot.

Are you missing someone? My Grampa and a few close friends (one of them the above-mentioned who who introduced me to the compound bow).

Favorite TV show? If I must, then pretty much anything on Animal Planet or the Discovery Channel.

What do you have an obsession with? Reading good books, which I have not been able to indulge in for quite some time now (damn school).

Has anyone ever said you looked like a celeb? The singer of the Cranberries, in junior high. If I actually did look like her then, I certainly don't now.

Who would you like to see right now? My Mom, my friends.

Ever had a near death experience? Zooming backwards off of a 15-foot cliff on an ATV is not fun, especially when, after landing on your back you look up to see said now-upside-down ATV just about to land right on top of you. To this day, the fact that the ATV landed some 10 feet away from my friend and I, right-side-up, still give mes chills and makes it impossible for me to not believe in paranormal stuff.

It should have landed on us. It didn't. I am awed.

Are you afraid of falling in love? Not anymore.

Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to? Yeah, but it was never anything that I had considered bad, or that was done with the intention of being bad. The roof of the bowling alley in Germany was just far too intriguing for an 8-year-old to not explore when some bowling alley staff left the door to the roof, at the very top of the very long stairs, behind a door that customers weren't really supposed to go through, unlocked. I was just pretending I was lost in a jungle full of booby traps somewhere and being hunted my scary, flesh-eating, jungle-natives, that's all.

Has anyone you were really close to passed away recently? My Grampa died in 2005, and my aunt and uncle died, several months apart, in 2007. Usually I'm ok with it all, but occasionally it will sneak up on me, like when I'm at my Grandma's house and I suddenly realize it's too quiet because my Grampa isn't whistling or singing softly to fill the silence.

What’s something that really bugs you? Hypocrisy. Arrogance. Stupidity. Pointless cruelty. Take your pick.

Taco Bell or Burger King? If I must, Taco Bell.

Next time you will kiss someone? Whenever I get home from work today.

Favorite baseball team? You assume I like baseball. I don't.

Ever call a 1-900 phone number? Nope. I read Laurell K. Hamilton for that. ;)

Nipple or Nose rings? My nose is pierced, and Matt's nipples are (which he apparently flashed for shock effect at a family get-together last weekend ...)

What’s the longest time you’ve gone without sleep? Everyone has these great stories about having stayed awake for x amount of days and hallucinating from sleep deprivation and stuff. I'm not nearly so thrilling and adventurous. I can't remember ever having stayed awake for even a full 24 hours. I think a friend and I tried to once, just to see how many cartoons we could watch in that time, but of course we fell asleep sometime in the wee hours of the morning while Bugs Bunny forgot to turn left at Albuquerque.

Last time you went bowling? Just a couple years ago, actually. Strangely, I bowl better when I'm drunk-ish.

Where is the weirdest place you have slept? Again, I'm far too dull to have a good story here. Weird for me is anything other than a bed, couch, or floor, so I guess camping would be my "weird" sleeping place, and even that's not really strange at all, actually.

Who did you last speak with on the phone? A teacher at a local high school wondering about the finer details of using a new program to out their high school newspaper together to send it to us (my work) for printing. I've never used said new program, and my boss - who has - is on vacation, so no progress was made.

What does your last received text message say? “Call when u can" from Matt.

What’s the closest orange object to you? A can of goldfish flakes.

Fun kitten video + Noisepsalm music

Ha! I figured out how to use iMovie! This movie is made from various early videos of Goblin and Sister doing what they do best, with the song The Villain Theme by Noisepsalm in the background, plus a few sound effects. I think it's pretty spiffy, m'self :D

I hate spiders.

Have I ever mentioned that here - that I hate spiders? I do.

Well, ok, Daddy Longlegs' are ok, and I actually think that jumping spiders are pretty damn cool, but those are the only two exceptions to the rule. Now, if a spider is small, I'm usually ok with it until and unless it crawls on me.

If I know it's poisonous, or if I don't know whether its poisonous or harmless but it's really fucking big, I revert to a little sissy girl and shiver and shake and squirm and wring my hands and wish I could just die or that I had a really big fucking gun or something to properly threaten it with.

When it's a really fucking big spider, and I don't know whether it's poisonous or not because I didn't get a good look at it because it was 1:30 in the goodamned morning and I was sleeping ok? until the damn thing decided to skitter across my elbow under the edge of my pillow and after freaking out and turning on the light and looking and not seeing it and then feeling it at my elbow again just on the inside of my shirt sleeve and squealing I'm sure and GRABBING IT and throwing it at the bookshelf right next to my bed only to freak out further because oh my fucking god the thing was big enough to GRAB HOLD OF AND THROW, well ... I have a tendency to stand in the middle of the kitchen, damn near naked because the fuckers can hide in clothes, arms folded tightly and fingers digging into my arms hard enough to hurt, terrified to even sit on the couch because if a spider can crawl on me while I'm sleeping peacefully in my bed why the heck can't one crawl on my while I'm sitting on the couch at 1:30 in the morning trying not to cry because I'm so freaked out?

Yeah. The wee early hours of this morning sucked big time.

I eventually ended up sleeping on the couch (the logic that bed or couch made no difference really in terms of easy spidery access tossed aside defiantly ok not so defiantly but because I really had not other choice) wrapped as tightly and coccoon-like in the covers as possible so as to leave absolutley no possible bit of space where a spider could crawl in, and of course I laid there for a good two hours staring at every corner and at every bump on the walls or ceiling that I could have sworn wasn't there mere minutes ago, rigid and trying to ignore those horrid little tickles you get on various limbs and such that feel like little insectle legs but aren't and you know this because you just not long ago HELD IN YOUR HAND something with real insectile legs so you know the difference between real spiders and the heebie jeebies but damn if you don't twitch and swipe and wimper at the heebie jeebie-tickles anyway.

I am now facing the prospect of trying to sleep tonight, and the thought makes me want to go stand in the middle of the kitchen again with all the lights on. Sigh. Good thing I don't have work tomorrow. I doubt I'll be getting much sleep.

No time. No point?

Total and complete edit: Yeah, never mind.

I just got moody, as I sometimes do. I'm over it ;) New posts soon.