Spring: Here we go again, kiddies

I have a love/hate relationship with spring. The artist and outdoors-lover in me cry out in joy at the sight of so much vibrant green, so many colorful flowers, such nice calm sunny cool days. The allergies in me beg for mercy as no wrongly-accused victim about to be slowly tortured to death has ever begged before.

Though you'd not know it to look at it, my car is actually a nice slightly greenish-silver color. Really. The fact that it's yellow right now - a vibrant, virulent, sulfric yellow - is not because I decided to go out and get a new paintjob; that's the fucking pollen that has covered - literally covered - the land as of late. My sinuses, my eyes, my throat- all are screaming for mercy, for an end to this horrid atrocity of plant-induced misery.

My eyes are red-rimmed, swollen, bloodshot, burning and itchy. My throat is raw. My nose exists in only two states- stuffy and running, or just plain running. And by that I don't mean a little drip here or there; I mean a full-fledged faucet has been installed in my nose, and someone jammed it to permanently "on." At night, it's Nyquil (on top of my top-of-the-line prescription allergy pill) and tissues stuffed up one or the other nostril (in some more severe cases, both nostrils) and me barely able to breathe and therefore barely able to sleep. During the day, it's operating anything (keyboard, mouse, car, etc.) one handed, as the other hand dares not move it's fist full of tissue away from my nose for even a second. 24-7, I'm cussing enough to make a pirate nervous. I've grown so used to the words "bless you," that I really don't hear them anymore, nor do I have to think to form the knee-jerk response of "thank you." It's like breathing, really; you just do it.

There are only two consolations. The first is when the Nyquil starts to work a bit, so that the tissue stuffed up either nostril doens't immediately soak through and need to be replaced, but rather lasts a good three or four hours before either it soaks through or the faucet switches to the other nostril. The second is, again, when the Nyquil starts to work a bit, so that its lovely fuzzy-headedness-inducing ingredients mix with the antihistamines in my prescription pill, and I get a little high. Only a little, though; just enough to make the act of standing up, to get something to eat or drink or to go to the bathroom, kinda fun. And don't worry, all you mom-types and dad-types out there; I did call my pharmacist first to ask if it was ok to take the Nyquil with the prescription allergy pill, and he said it was, so I have medical permission to get a little high. I promise. And I don't drive while taking both; I just sit or lay on the couch and drool on myself while watching old episodes of The Simpsons.

On a side note, I'd like to thank the individual or individuals who decided to go ahead and start putting all the seasons of various much-loved TV shows on DVD. Watching season two of The Simpons sends me right back to my childhood days. Now I just need to get the Nintendo game, if they have it for SNES, and I'm all set.

Going back to medications, I'm happy to report that Harry doesn't need any; he got a clean bill of health at the vet on Friday. What had me worried about him was that he developed these weird pale patches on his legs (three of them, anyway), his chest, and his throat, and I'd never seen anything like it before. The scales were not dry and brownish to indicate he was about to start shedding (he had just finished shedding about a week before, in fact); they felt just like the rest of his scales, only they looked like someone had tried to drain them of color and got pretty far with it. The only thing I could find in my research about discoloration of scales was something about bacterial infections, only in those the scales are darker, not lighter, and they swell and pus up a bit. Also, bacterial infections only tagret a few scales individually or in very small groups, not whole limbs. I had no idea what was going on, but knew that with reptiles illness is very dangerous; by the time they start to show any abnormalities or symptoms, it's almost too late to help them. Many reptiles die of things that can be easily fixed, all because it's so hard to detremine if there's something wrong with them. Having to wait almost a week to get him in to a vet had me seriously worried about him.

I finally got him to the vet on Friday, and lo and behold, the strange, never-before-seen pale patches were starting to dry and peel; the lil' stinker was shedding again, that's all. When I mentioned that he'd just recently shed, the vet smiled and said that right after winter reptiles have a tendency to shed more frequently, as they're becoming more active and eating more, and therefore growing more. I guess I just never noticed that before, but then, I don't usually find shedding to be something worth writing home about.

As for Harry's overall health, he's doing very well. The vet had only two suggestions: that I feed him more whole prey items than veggies and fruits, and that I use flourescent tube lights for lighting rather than the UVA/UVB reptile bulbs because, although they claim to have the necessary UVA/UVB waves for reptiles, it turns out the bulbs often don't have enough of it, where the tubes do (well, for six months anyway). So Harry gets to crunch more crickets, mealworms, earthworms, waxworms and pinkies, and until I can get him the tube lighting (and even after, as it wouldn't hurt) he gets a half hour outside in direct sunlight each day. His weight is good, his color is fanatstic, eyes clear, mouth clean, no mites or ticks, and his temperament has always been shining. In short, I get a pat on the back for being a good lizard-mom.

Needless, to say, I'm ridiculously relieved that he's ok. I even got him a tub of mealworms that day not only to bulk up the meat in his diet but also as a treat, because he loves them and I hate them. Really. There are very few things in this world that legitimately creep me out, give me the willies, make me want to jump up on a chair and squeal like a little girl, and mealworms are the Number One Creepy-Crawly for me. I hate them. I shudder at the mere thought of them.

But, dutifully, I cut their creepy little heads off (you have to do that because if the lizard eats them too fast they'll chew their way out of said lizard's stomach, killing the lizard) and feed the wriggling, slippery, gut-spilling bodies to Harry, who would do cartwheels of joy if he could. He crunches madly, and I try not to watch as afore-mentioned guts slither about, sometimes sticking to the sides of his jaws. He's happy, so I oblige, and hope my imagination does not get the better of me later at night, showing me images of mealworm heads chewing their way out of the garbage can and into the bedroom where my unprotected toes await ...

The things I do for my critters ...

And so, spring has definately sprung (I swear it was hiding right around the corner, just waiting to leap out and get me) and aside from haywire allergies and sick-lizard scares, it's actually nice. I could ramble on about the beauty of it, but all you need to do is look outside to see it for yourself, so do that. Get out with friends and family and enjoy the weather. I plan on enjoying it with the boy and the lizard, and perhaps some nice strawberry sorbet.