Hello, my name is Sausage Woman

That oughtta get this blog some hits ...

So. I'm 26 now. Feels an awful lot like 25. Two days ago - the day before my birthday - I finally got the horned viper tattoo on my left arm colored in. It's beautiful, if you can see past the swelling. No, there's nothing wrong with the tattoo; no infection, it wasn't done poorly, the artist didn't have a heavy hand, etc. It's simply a big fucking tattoo, going from my wrist to half way up my upper arm. That's alot of ink, and a lot of pain.

At just under five and a half hours straight this was my longest ink session yet, and I'm now paying for it. I wanted to get the whole thing done all at once, so that I woldn't be walking around with a half-finished tattoo, and now pride is biting me in the ass. Or rather, the arm. Although I seem to tolerate pain very well, my body doesn't; due to having so much work done in one area, my arm is in shock, so to speak.

Although the only pain right now is a sort of pulling ache when I stretch that arm, that arm is pretty swollen, and has been since Saturday. Holding both arms up side by side, it almost looks like the arms of two differemt people: I have a fat person's arm on a non-fat person's body. The swelling goes from elbow to the first finger knuckles, so my hand looks wierd, too - all puffy and pudgy looking, with nice slim fingers. It's kinda creepy, actually.

Now, before you go and get all worried-parent-ish on me, let me tell you know that it's perfectly ok. My arm is not going to fall off. I am not going to lose feeling in it. It's not going to grow pussy sores (har, har) and leak gross stuff all over the place. I am not going to die. I promise.

This reaction is a natural one. Most tattoos swell; the amount of the swelling is usually proportional to the size of the tattoo and the sensitivity of the tattooee's (is that a word?) skin. Being all manner of Irish and Scanadanavian, all you have to do is look at me hard and I bruise, so needles jabbing over and over again is definatley going to made my skin mad and as I said before, it's a big tattoo, so my arm never really had a chance.

It's not as swollen today as it was yesterday, though, so it is calming down. And 800 mg of Ibuprofen have tamed the aching joints in my wrist and hand (just for shits and giggles, my arthritis kicked in yesterday all of it's own accord, and due to the swelling either wouldn't or couldn't go away.) So, virtually pain free, I'm enjoying the easy time I have until the healing kicks into high gear and the dead top layer of skin starts to peel off and itch like a motherfucker. Once that gets going, I'll be damn near rabid and my coworkers may well have to restrain me so I can't find a way to scratch it and thereby screw it up.

As a warning, any posts made during The Itching Time will probably be senseless and full of odd profanties and dire threats to just about anyone who happens to wander into my line of sight or thought, but I won't actually mean any of it (and I will realize this and apologize once The Itching Time stops in about a week ...)

All that said, I'm ridiculously thrilled. I can't stop looking at all the pretty colors. I'd post photos of it, but it would look better to wait till the swelling is gone and it's fully healed. Look for photos sometime next week and until then, have a great week and stay away from sausage-armed small people (especially if they're twitching spasmodically.)