Accidentally risqué

I am a creature of habit, and being such I have come to depend on certain things being generally the same each day simply because they almost always have been in the past. Makes sense, right?

So, knowing that at my work it's usually cold enough to hang meat I planned on wearing my most favorite, overlarge, comfy hoodie to work today. It's the black one that says "System Of A Down" on the front in bright, almost glow-in-the-dark pale green , with a black and almost-glow-in-the-dark pale green picture of the band on the back. I love that hoodie. However, when wearing a sweater/sweatshirt/coat/jacket at work to stave off the cold I have also realized that every once in a while, when the air conditioning clicks off for about twenty minutes or so because it's become too cold, it can actually begin to get hot, and so the sweater or whatever needs to come off. This bears the wearer to the now even more ridiculously cold air, but is a necessary discomfort to avoid the worse trauma of being hot (I loathe being hot, which is ironic as I live in California). It is aggravating, to say the least. It usually drives me batty.

I thought I'd be smart this morning.

My System hoodie is just thick enough to keep me warm against the arctic office gales, but (usually) just thin enough to not be sweltering. It does get a bit warm when the air conditioning kicks off, however, so there's where I needed to be clever. Instead of wearing just a regular t-shirt under the hoodie, which is my usual attire and thicker than desired, I instead slipped on one of my lace-trimmed tank tops. I chose this particualr one because the fabric is very thin and so keeps me cool and, paired with the hoodie, I thought the combination should be just about perfect. The hoodie would protect me from wintery air conditioning, and the thin tank top underneath would prevent me from getting actually hot when the a.c. kicked off for a bit every now and then.

I thought it was a fool-proof plan, but then it was only 6:30 in the morning.

Attired thusly, I stumbled groggily into work this morning (I was up pretty late last night computing accounting stuff and my brain is still twitching). About ten minutes later I began to realize that instead of nicely comfortable I was beggining to feel a bit warm. Within another five minutes I had desperately clawed my hoodie off and tossed it in the corner, and I was still hot.

Unlike damn near every other day of the friggin' year, it's hot at my work today. Rather than running th e a.c. to polar bear standards, the heater is on in what I can only assume to be an attempt to convince rattlers and scorpions and camels and other desert creatures to make this place home.

Remember I had mentioned that the tank top's material is very thin? Because of that I'm now only very mildly warm, but have a bigger problem of a different sort. Lightweight fabric means there is usually a level of sheerness. All one has to do is take on glance at me to realize that I was wise this moring and wore a white bra with my white tank top, and that the bit of tattoo readily seen above the fabric on my upper back does in fact continue all down my back, beneath the fabric.

I may as well not be wearing a shirt at all. But, I'm not hot.

The only other shirt-type articles of clothing I have at work to cover up with besides tmy System hoodie are two other, much heavier hoodies. I'm hoping that the a.c. will kick on in a few minutes, but if it doesn't with in the next ten or fifteen, I'll have to go back home to grab adifferent shirt. I've made this mistake before and everyone was wise enough then not to mention the see-though-ness of the shirt, but it's still rather more than awkward.

The moral of the story, of course - and Mama Wren and I w ere just talking about this yesterday - is to never ever depend on anything to be as you expect it to be. As soon as you do - no matter how logical and sound the assumption - the Universe will delight in proving you wrong.

Now, pardon me while I cover myself.